Monday, October 8, 2012
Opposition
The tides have changed with my mom's support for homeschooling. She used to be all for it when I said I wanted to homeschool Simone at around 4th grade. Lately, I've been thinking I want to homeschool her sooner - like 1st grade! Since we're going to do Classical education which is taught in cycles of 4 years, I was leaning towards starting her at the beginning of a cycle in 1st grade instead of starting in the middle at 2nd grade.
When I told my mom this yesterday, she made it known that she thought it was a bad idea. Her main argument for keeping her in school was that Simone needs to be exposed socially so she can deal with peer pressure. She asked why I thought homeschooling was a good idea, and I responded that it's more efficient. Again my mom stressed that Simone needs socialization, which I think is something that she can get through gymnastic classes, swim classes, 4H, etc. Yes peer pressure will always be around, but I don't need her to be in school 6 hours to learn about. One hour intervals is fine enough.
My mom further argued that Simone may not listen to me. I had just told her how Simone wanted to do things her way when I asked her to write "I can hop." Simone did do it her way, but she ended up writing an extra letter with "I can play." I like to think of it as Simone's way of subliminally encouraging me to let her have fun. I answered my mom with an analogy. "Just like with breastfeeding in which 'there is no try, only do,' I will just have to force Simone to listen to me." My mom, I could tell was not satisfied so I told her in a light and jovial tone, "I can tell this is all going over your head and you don't agree." She laughed too and said, "We'll just agree to disagree."
Honestly, it angers me. But it's not worth it to try to convince her I think we're doing the right thing. And actually, it's not the only right thing to do. My niece and nephew who will go to conventional schooling will learn as much as our kids! There's many ways to do things; I just wish my mom would see that alternate paths can lead to the same endpoint.
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It is always the "socialization" argument that comes up, isn't it? Yet, in school, they need to be quiet and do their work - not speak unless permitted to, after raising their hand - so the argument really baffles me. The socialization mainly happens at lunch and recess, with is what? An hour? Hour and a half, total?
ReplyDeletePublic school is fine, of course. But, as the parent, you need to weigh the choices. It sounds like you explained your position well. For me, "socializing" my son meant taking him to the playground, Youth Center on base, Tae Kwon Do class, the community garden for playdates while the adults worked, etc. Now that he's a pre-teen, he has more freedom to go out and play with his friends on his own, but it wasn't that difficult for me to get him involved in activities when he was younger.
Sometimes, yes, they don't listen or they push back. Mostly my son is very receptive to me as his teacher (but not his father, for whatever reason - I think it might have to do with different teaching "styles"). And those are the days you either gently encourage them or, if it's really bad, call it a day off and not fight an up hill battle. You figure out what's best and go from there.
Whatever education choice you make, go with your intuition and what is best for your family. The same goes for homeschooling: listen to what your daughter is telling you, on all levels, and it will work out just fine. :)
Thanks for your encouragement and advice. It's so needed!
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